QUOTES FROM DEER CAMP

Deer season for riflemen opened this past Saturday. I was fortunate enough to have been invited to (2-buck) Coleman County just south of Abilene, TX. I was the guest of my dentist and two of his friends. One of the friends I knew pretty well. The other was new to me and the other guest at the deer lease. Here are some quotes overheard from this weekend:

• The .22 Hornet is the fastest .22 caliber on the market today.
  
• My favorite load for a .22 Hornet is a 150-grain bullet.
  
• Pointing at a Marlin .30-30: That's the gun that won the West!
  
• An (open-sighted) .30-30 is effective on deer out to 300-350 yards.
  
• I know an 'ol boy who fishes for trophy "stripers" using rainbow trout.
  
• There are people killing those bars in Alaska with the .357 Magnum.
  
• Bull Elk travel in bunches with other bulls- always.
  
• Young boys should learn to shoot with a .30-30, nothing else.
  
• You can never have enough .30-30's. Why- I have ten.
  
• A spike deer will only produce more spike deer- it's a genticks flaw.
  
• Them new .17HMR bullets are faster than all other rimfires.

Folks, I ain't got any tongue left I had to bite it so much. Me and two other guys were literally held hostage by this moron and his emphatic prognostications. Unfortunately, the laws of physics aren't biased when it comes to moronic behavior - Newton's 1st Law of Motion was proven continuously as that mouth NEVER stopped moving.

Though I had a great time hunting a new place, at the insistence of my very kind friend who actually paid for the lease, offered unparalleled hospitality, brought the faire and generally made sure that everyone's needs were met, I was at the mercy of one guy who had a dysentery-like case of the classic "know-it-all" syndrome. I don't care who you grew up with that you are thinking about right now while you read this- no one can keep up with this guy- hands down, he is the world champeen!

(Well...so much for diplomacy within these posts!)

Anyone else had a "bad" hunting excursion and lived to tell about it? Honestly, the hunting part of the weekend was grand - I was all alone in my stand for hours on end. It was when I had to return to camp that things became hellish. I felt bad for my host. I'm not sure he was prepared for the verbal onslaught. (WHEW!)